Fails Gym Class

by Mountain Jew

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The FitnessGram™ Pacer Test is a multistage aerobic capacity test that progressively gets more difficult as it continues. The 20 meter pacer test will begin in 30 seconds. Line up at the start. The running speed starts slowly, but gets faster each minute after you hear this signal. [beep] A single lap should be completed each time you hear this sound. [ding] Remember to run in a straight line, and run as long as possible. The second time you fail to complete a lap before the sound, your test is over. The test will begin on the word start. On your mark, get ready, start.


released June 22, 2017

Recorded by Ananth Batni and Matt Davenport at UMBC Studios and Pretty Good Studios

Mixed and Mastered by Ananth Batni at Pretty Good Studios

Mountain Jew is:
Ananth Batni- Drums, Gang Vocals, Backing Vocals on Thirsty
Walter Commins- Gang Vocals, Trombone on Salty
Declan Enright- Electric Guitar, Gang Vocals Acoustic Guitar and Bass on Thirsty, Backing Vocals on Peacock
David Gardner- Accordion, Melodica, Piano
Aeryn Goldstein- Lead Vocals, Gang Vocals, Shaker
Luis Orta- Saxophone, Gang Vocals, Vibraslap
Dylan Peters- Bass
Abram Shaw- Acoustic Guitar, Cello, Djembe

Other musicians:
Shesh Batni- Gang Vocals
Jonas Farrah Bumstead- Gang Vocals
Jan Knutson- Trombone, Relatable Quotes
Aaron McGlown- Bass on Jersey and Salty
Jacob Ward- That dude who cracks the first trumpet note on jersey

Pop Rock Hero, Band Fund, California, Peacock, Not With That Attitude, Jersey, Not About the Fame, We Only Know, and Salty Written by Aeryn Goldstein and Mountain Jew
Axe (Title by Claire Lewis) and Thirsty Written by Declan Enright and Mountain Jew
The Walter Waltz Written by Walter Commins and Mountain Jew

Photo By Scott Candey

Artists we ripped off for this album:
Every shitty 2000s pop punk one hit wonder, Kill Lincoln, The Green Days or The Fall Out Boys, Every shitty 2000s garage one hit wonder, Foo Fighters, Tomato Dodgers, Walter's Electric Piano, NOBS Brass Band, Kendrick Lamar, The Front Bottoms, The Realest Biggest Fish, The B-182s, Every girl in West Chester Pennsylvania

Other people who have played with Mountain Jew that we gotta thank:
Charlie Green, Jillian Masters, Jermaine Fryer, Daniel Sharpe, Laura Davis, Ben Shaw, Cecilia Staggers, Charlie Steinman, Bret Goldstein, Jon Fuchs, Ivan Reimers, Miles Harriston, Abby Mancini, Matthew Spooner, Ashley Thomas, Patrick Cable, Nat Jones, Charles Scheider

Good groups of people who have made the band a lot of fun:
Families (Particularly the Batnis, Goldsteins, and Shaws for opening up rehearsal space,) Any band that had Charlie Steinman or Anna Wilson or Rael Griffin or Jonas Farrah-Bumstead in it, Ron Akins, Matt Davenport, Dylan Howes, 3rd Grade Friends, Aerial View, Black Rhinocerous, Blue Sky Dream, Eric Daino, Flashlight, Fuzzqueen, Greenhouse, Holy Crust, Hot Sad Kyle, Knuckleberry Finn, Lighthouse Row, They'll Have Dreams, Thirteen Towers, The Worthwhile Fight, The Folks at Twin Moon, The Maid, The Takoma VFW, Slash Run, 16th Street, Good Buds, Dude Sick, Joseph Doyle's snap stories, That's Your House, Moderate to severe perspiration, The Fitnessgram Pacer Test, The Real Dylan Peters, Bill Clinton playing Careless Whisper, Feesh Hooks, All of the strictly catholic schools we attended, The gym teachers that failed us at said catholic schools



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Mountain Jew Washington, D.C.

Party rock band from the D[M]V. We parody your favorite music and do fun covers of trap and pop punk songs

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